I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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