Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
