okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
