I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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