I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize