uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
honey bunches of taint.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
