Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
