worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize