wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
