Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
