That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Randomize
