I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
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I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
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Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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