3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
