She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
