Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
