I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
This baby is an asshole
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
