She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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