There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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