I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
