She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
