If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
