i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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