He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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