i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Randomize
