It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
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