Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
