At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize