Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
