I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize