I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
