physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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