I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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