Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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