They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
