oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
