Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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