good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize