just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
