nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
