i jhust puked up my retainher.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
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