I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
It's Friday. Sex?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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