I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
one might say we're banned from that church
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
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