Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
