from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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