And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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