I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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