problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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