I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I see more hoeing in ur future
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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