Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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