using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize