i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
