when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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